Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Slow Down … to Enjoy Life

I don’t usually read forwarded email, but I received one today that caught my attention. It was written by someone who works at Volvo in Sweden, and he mentions how any project in the company “takes 2 years to be finalized, even if the idea is simple and brilliant. It’s a rule.”

Apparently the fast-paced global corporate world, focused on immediate results, “contrasts greatly with the slow movements of the Swedish. They, on the other hand, debate, debate, debate, hold x quantity of meetings and work with a slowdown scheme. At the end, this always yields better results.”

He relates the following story:

The first time I was in Sweden, one of my colleagues picked me up at the hotel every morning. It was September, bit cold and snowy. We would arrive early at the company and he would park far away from the entrance (2000 employees drive their car to work). The first day, I didn’t say anything, either the second or third. One morning I asked, “Do you have a fixed parking space? I’ve noticed we park far from the entrance even when there are no other cars in the lot.” To which he replied, “Since we’re here early we’ll have time to walk, and whoever gets in late will be late and need a place closer to the door. Don’t you think? Imagine my face.

He goes on to talk about a movement in Europe named Slow Food, which “establishes that people should eat and drink slowly, with enough time to taste their food, spend time with the family, friends, without rushing. Slow Food is against its counterpart: the spirit of Fast Food and what it stands for as a lifestyle.”

I love this idea. It is what is at the heart of the simplicity movement, as well as those who are trying to live frugal lives. It’s not just a matter of reducing clutter or saving money … it’s a matter of slowing down to enjoy life more, of savoring life’s simple pleasures, of rejecting on some level the materialistic culture we are all caught up in and embracing fellow humans instead. It is about changing our values and priorities.

He goes on:

Basically, the movement questions the sense of “hurry” and “craziness” generated by globalization, fueled by the desire of “having in quantity” (life status) versus “having with quality”, “life quality” or the “quality of being”. French people, even though they work 35 hours per week, are more productive than Americans or British. Germans have established 28.8 hour workweeks and have seen their productivity been driven up by 20%. This slow attitude has brought forth the US’s attention, pupils of the fast and the “do it now!”.

This no-rush attitude doesn’t represent doing less or having a lower productivity. It means working and doing things with greater quality, productivity, perfection, with attention to detail and less stress. It means reestablishing family values, friends, free and leisure time. Taking the “now”, present and concrete, versus the “global”, undefined and anonymous. It means taking humans’ essential values, the simplicity of living.

It stands for a less coercive work environment, more happy, lighter and more productive where humans enjoy doing what they know best how to do. It’s time to stop and think on how companies need to develop serious quality with no-rush that will increase productivity and the quality of products and services, without losing the essence of spirit.

Many of us live our lives running behind time, but we only reach it when we die of a heart attack or in a car accident rushing to be on time. Others are so anxious of living the future that they forget to live the present, which is the only time that truly exists. We all have equal time throughout the world. No one has more or less. The difference lies in how each one of us does with our time. We need to live each moment. As John Lennon said, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans”.

I found a cool site called Slow Down Now that offers some tips for slowing down, including:

Have a cup of tea, put your feet up and stare out of the window. Warning: don’t try this while driving.
Spend some quality time in the bathtub.
Write down these words and place them where you can see them, “Multitasking is a Moral Weakness.”
Try to do only one thing at a time.

Monday, December 30, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #9

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #9: Get a coach or take a class.

Yeah, I know. Too much trouble. Well, stop making excuses! :)

Having a swim coach has been very motivating for me. Not because the coach yells at me like a Marine drill sergeant, or encourages me every step of the way … but I show up simply because I know the coach is there waiting for me, and I try hard because of course I want to look like a good student. And then there’s the added motivation that you’re paying for this, so you better not waste it!

I’ve only missed a couple session with my coach, and they were both cases of life getting in the way (my daughter’s soccer game, for example), not of me not being motivated. Yes, there have been times when I didn’t feel like doing my swim workout for the day, but I went anyway, because I had made a commitment to my coach.

This can work for many goals. Want to get your finances in shape? Meet with an advisor. If nothing else, it will force you to sit down and take a look at your finances, and think about some strategies that will work for you. Want to learn computer programming? Take a class. Not because you need a class to learn, but because you will be motivated to actually show up, and to do the reading, and to do the work required to learn the skill.

This works with just about any skill — learning Spanish, to play a guitar, to learn clay modeling. Want to lose weight? Get a personal trainer. He or she will not only motivate you to work out, but motivate you to eat right too, especially if you have to report your progress to him.

This might be one of the more expensive ways of motivating yourself, but it works. And if you do some research, you might find some cheap classes in your area, or you might know a friend who will provide coaching or counseling for free.

Sunday, December 29, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #10

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #10: Find inspiration, on a daily basis.

Inspiration is one of the best motivators, and it can be found everywhere. Every day, seek inspiration, and it will help sustain motivation over the long term. Here are some of my sources of inspiration:


  • Blogs by people achieving my goal
  • Success stories by other people (search online)
  • Forums with other people going through the same thing
  • Friends and family
  • Magazine articles
  • Bios of high achievers (like Ben Franklin, Lance Armstrong)
  • Books about my goal
  • Quotes
  • Photos (set as your desktop pic!)
  • People I meet every day, if I get the chance to talk to them
  • Use these, or find your own sources of inspiration, and make it a daily habit to be inspired. Then set off towards your dreams, energized!

Saturday, December 28, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #11

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #11: Reward yourself. Often.

And not just for longer-term goals, either. In Hack #12, I talked about breaking larger goals into smaller, mini goals. Well, each of those mini goals should have a reward attached to it. Make a list of your goals, with mini goals, and next to each, write down an appropriate reward. By appropriate, I mean 1) it’s proportionate to the size of the goal (don’t reward going on a 1-mile run with a luxury cruise in the Bahamas); and 2) it doesn’t ruin your goal — if you are trying to lose weight, don’t reward a day of healthy eating with a dessert binge. It’s self-defeating.

Now, that doesn’t mean you can’t have sweet rewards now and then, even if you’re trying to eat healthy. But make them smaller treats, and only on occasion. For example, I often reward myself on the weekend for a good week of eating healthy and resisting temptations. This is not a daily reward, but once a week. And on the weekends, I often go for a run (or do a race), do my Sunday bike ride, and yard work. I’m burning off that sweet weekend reward anyway.

Rewards can be anything you like. Some of mine have included sweet treats, new running shoes, a running mp3 player, books, running clothes, dinner at a nice restaurant, or other things I’ve been holding back on because I’m trying to be frugal. You might also like a massage, or shoes, or clothes, or a manicure or facial. I’m not that into those things, but you might be.

At any rate, don’t just indulge yourself — celebrate! Feel good about your accomplishment, and look back on all the hard work you put in. It’s important that you make a big deal about it, because this will make you feel good about your goal activities, and motivate you to do more. Tell family and friends about it. Be proud of yourself. Give yourself a gold star.

Friday, December 27, 2013

Purpose Your Day: Most Important Task (MIT)

I’ve mentioned this briefly in my morning routine, but I thought I’d explain a little bit more about MITs – Most Important Tasks. It’s not an original concept, but one that I use on a daily basis and that has helped me out tremendously.

It’s very simple: your MIT is the task you most want or need to get done today. In my case, I’ve tweaked it a bit so that I have three MITs — the three things I must accomplish today. Do I get a lot more done than three things? Of course. But the idea is that no matter what else I do today, these are the things I want to be sure of doing. So, the MIT is the first thing I do each day, right after I have a glass of water to wake me up.

And here’s the key to the MITs for me: at least one of the MITs should be related to one of my goals. While the other two can be work stuff (and usually are), one must be a goal next-action. This ensures that I am doing something to move my goals forward that day.

And that makes all the difference in the world. Each day, I’ve done something to make my dreams come true. It’s built into my morning routine: set a next-action to accomplish for one of my goals. And so it happens each day, automatically.

Another key: do your MITs first thing in the morning, either at home or when you first get to work. If you put them off to later, you will get busy and run out of time to do them. Get them out of the way, and the rest of the day is gravy!

It’s such a small thing to implement, and yet I’m raving about it like it’s a huge revelation. But it is. Sometimes small things can make big differences. I highly recommend you give it a go.

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #12

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #12: Break it into smaller, mini goals.

Sometimes large or longer-term goals can be overwhelming. After a couple weeks, we may lose motivation, because we still have several months or a year or more left to accomplish the goal. It’s hard to maintain motivation for a single goal for such a long time.

Solution: have smaller goals along the way. For example, in running, I may have a training plan that lasts three months. But along the way, I may have races every two or three weeks, and training for each race will keep me motivated. Also, on an even smaller scale, I might have a goal just for this week, and another just for today, in terms of my training. And finally, even within a single run, I might set smaller goals for each mile (“Just run another mile at this strong pace, don’t think about the five miles after that!”).

This can be done with any goal. Something that’s accomplishable and just ahead of you, instead of way down the road, is something you’re more likely to go after. Trying to get debt free? Focus on one small debt, and celebrate when it’s done. If your debts aren’t too small, focus on getting one debt down by $500 (for example), and then focus on the next $500, and so on.

Once you’re done with each mini goal, you celebrate. Then you set your sights on the next mini goal. Achieve enough of these, and you’ve made incredible progress on the larger goal. Once in awhile, step back and look at the larger picture. You’ll be pleased at how far you’ve come already.

Wednesday, December 25, 2013

100 Ways to Have Fun with Your Kids for Free or Cheap

Yesterday I posted about Family Day, where we try to have fun together as a family, often for free or without spending much money. I thought it would be useful to list some ways to have fun with your kids without spending a lot of money:


  1. Have a reading marathon.
  2. Write stories together.
  3. Play soccer.
  4. Paint or draw together.
  5. Create a fort in your living room out of blankets or cardboard boxes.
  6. Go on a hike.
  7. Have a sunset picnic at a park or beach.
  8. Play board games.
  9. Play kickball.
  10. Get up early, pack breakfast, and have a sunrise breakfast.
  11. Go to a museum.
  12. Go to a playground.
  13. Play hide-and-seek.
  14. Have a pillow fight.
  15. Ride bikes.
  16. Build sandcastles.
  17. Rent a dvd and make popcorn.
  18. Tell stories.
  19. Have a scavenger hunt.
  20. Make mazes or puzzles for each other to solve.
  21. Play card games.
  22. Garden together.
  23. Bake cookies (let the kids help).
  24. Go to the zoo.
  25. Go to the library.
  26. Shop at a thrift shop.
  27. Create a blog together.
  28. Create a scrapbook.
  29. Make a movie using a camcorder and computer.
  30. Learn to play music.
  31. Fingerpaint.
  32. Make play dough from scratch.
  33. Make homemade mini pizzas.
  34. Buy popsicles.
  35. Make hand-painted T-shirts.
  36. Set up a hammock, make lemonade, relax.
  37. Go to a pool.
  38. Go to a public place, people watch, and make up imaginary stories about people.
  39. Visit family.
  40. Write letters to family.
  41. Paint or decorate the kids’ room.
  42. Make milkshakes.
  43. Play freeze tag.
  44. Create a treasure hunt for them (leaving clues around the house or yard).
  45. Decorate a pair of jeans.
  46. Do a science experiment.
  47. Play games online.
  48. Teach them to play chess.
  49. Learn magic tricks.
  50. Create a family book, with information and pictures about each family member.
  51. Fly kites.
  52. Go snorkeling.
  53. Barbecue.
  54. Volunteer.
  55. Donate stuff to charity.
  56. Compete in a three-legged or other race.
  57. Create an obstacle course.
  58. Pitch a tent and sleep outside with marshmallows.
  59. Roast marshmallows.
  60. Play loud music and dance crazy.
  61. Write and produce a play (to perform before other family members).
  62. Paint each other’s faces.
  63. Have a water balloon fight.
  64. Have a gun-fight with those foam dart guns.
  65. Explore your yard and look for insects.
  66. Go for a walk and explore the neighborhood.
  67. Go jogging.
  68. Take pictures of nature.
  69. Play a trivia game.
  70. Make up trivia questions about each other.
  71. Make hot cocoa.
  72. Play house.
  73. Decorate the house with decorations you make.
  74. Make popsicles.
  75. Play school.
  76. Do shadow puppets.
  77. Make a comic book.
  78. Play in the rain.
  79. Make mud pies.
  80. Blow bubbles.
  81. Take turns saying tongue twisters.
  82. Sing songs.
  83. Tell ghost stories in the dark with a flashlight.
  84. Build stuff with Legos.
  85. Give them a bubble bath.
  86. Play with squirt guns.
  87. Play video games together.
  88. Play wiffleball.
  89. Play nerf football.
  90. Build a rocket from a kit.
  91. Bake a cake and decorate it.
  92. Play dress-up.
  93. Thumb-wrestle, play mercy, or have a tickle fight.
  94. Make a gingerbread house, or decorate gingerbread men.
  95. Learn and tell each other jokes.
  96. Play basketball.
  97. Learn to juggle.
  98. Walk barefoot in the grass and pick flowers.
  99. Build paper airplanes and have a flying contest.
  100. Prank call their grandparents, using disguised, humorous voices.


Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #13

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #13: Give it time, be patient.

I know, this is easier said than done. But the problem with many of us is that we expect quick results. I blame this on our quick-fix, immediate-gratification culture. We want a diet that will give us results in two weeks. We want to workout and have a flat stomach in four weeks. We want to get out of debt in two months and we want to retire in a few years. Well, unless you were almost there to start with, it ain’t gonna happen.

When you think about your goals, think long term. If you want to lose weight, you may see some quick initial losses, but it will take a long time to lose the rest. If you want to run a marathon, you won’t be able to do it overnight. If you don’t see the results you want soon, don’t give up … give it time. In the meantime, be happy with your progress so far, and with your ability to stick with your goals. The results will come if you give it time.

As an example, my weight loss has slowed down considerably since I initially lost 20 pounds. I think I was taking in too many calories. I might still be, but I’ve cut back on sweets and I’ve stepped up the exercise, with the triathlon training that I’m doing. Now I think I’m losing weight (or fat) again, slowly. I don’t weigh myself much, but people have been commenting on it a lot. The thing is, I’m still far from my goal of having a flat stomach … but I know that if I give it time, I will get there.

Monday, December 23, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #14

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #14: Make it a pleasure.

One reason we might put off something that will help us achieve our goal, such as exercise for example, is because it seems like hard work. Well, this might be true, but the key is to find a way to make it fun or pleasurable.

To take running as an example: I began running in the morning at the time just before the sun rises, and as I did my morning run, the sky became an amazing display of colors. I would look up at the sky as I ran, taking in this daily miracle, take a deep breath, and say to myself, “What a glorious day!” It was truly a celebration of life. The next morning, I would look forward to greeting the new day this way. It was a pleasure.

Another example: making your exercise or other activity a social activity can make it fun. You might go cycling with a group, for example, and chat with them as you ride. Or run with a group. If you do this, you don’t even realize you’re working out!

Yet another example: Let’s say you want to keep track of your expenses each day, or write every morning. Well, you could make a little ritual where you input your expenses in your spreadsheet, or write for 30 minutes, while taking in your first cup of coffee in the morning. Savor the aroma and flavor of the coffee, sip it slowly while doing the activity you want. Or it could be hot chocolate, or in my case fresh berries. Whatever would make the activity a pleasure.

If your goal activity becomes a treat, you actually look forward to it. And that’s a good thing.

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #15

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #15: Just get started.

There are some days when you don’t feel like heading out the door for a run, or figuring out your budget, or whatever it is you’re supposed to do that day for your goal. Well, instead of thinking about how hard it is, and how long it will take, tell yourself that you just have to start.

I have a rule (not an original one) that I just have to put on my running shoes and close the door behind me. After that, it all flows naturally. It’s when you’re sitting in your house, thinking about running and feeling tired, that it seems hard. Once you start, it is never as hard as you thought it would be. This tip works for me every time.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #16

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #16: Get a workout partner or goal buddy.

Staying motivated on your own is tough. But if you find someone with similar goals (running, dieting, finances, etc.), see if they’d like to partner with you. Or partner with your spouse, sibling or best friend on whatever goals they’re trying to achieve. You don’t have to be going after the same goals — as long as you are both pushing and encouraging each other to succeed.

For example, my wife and I became goal buddies. We each set our top goals for the year, and we have weekly meetings to set our monthly goals, to set weekly goals, and to review our progress for the past week (or for the past month, at the end of each month). We continually remind, encourage, push and reward each other. It can be a fun way to stay on track.

I also have a workout partner. While I run with my wife most of the time, I also swim and bike with a friend of mine named Patrick. We’re both beginner swimmers, so it’s good to have someone at my level. He’s a more experienced cyclist, which is cool because he can teach me the basics as we ride.

Having a workout partner or a goal buddy is a great idea because you don’t just have yourself to answer to — you have to answer to that other person as well. You’re more likely to stick to your workout or your goal for the week if you have someone to meet. No one likes to stand someone else up or look bad to other people.

Friday, December 20, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #17

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #17: Post a picture of your goal someplace visible — near your desk or on your refrigerator, for example.

Visualizing your goal, exactly how you think it will be when you’ve achieved it, whether it’s financial goals like traveling to Rome or building a dream house, or physical goals like finishing a marathon or getting a flat stomach, is a great motivator and one of the best ways of actualizing your goals.

Find a magazine photo or a picture online and post it somewhere where you can see it not only daily, but hourly if possible. Put it as your desktop photo, or your home page. Use the power of your visual sense to keep you focused on your goal. Because that focus is what will keep you motivated over the long term — once you lose focus, you lose motivation, so having something to keep bringing your focus back to your goal will help keep that motivation.

Other similar ideas: Make your own motivational poster. Create a dream scrapbook, with clippings of photos or drawings of your own of each of your goals. Or use a bracelet, or other accessory, as a reminder of your goal.

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #18

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #18: Join an online (or off-line) group to help keep you focused and motivated.

When I started to run, more than a year ago, I joined a few different forums, at different times, on different sites, such as Men’s Health (the Belly-Off Runner’s Club), Runner’s World, Cool Running, and the running group at About.com. I did the same when I was quitting smoking.

Each time I joined a forum, it helped keep me on track. Not only did I meet a bunch of other people who were either going through what I was going through or who had already been through it, I would report my progress (and failures) as I went along. They were there for great advice, for moral support, to help keep me going when I wanted to stop.

Now, there are many such groups or forums out there, each of them good and with their own personalities. Don’t be afraid to just jump in (after reading the FAQ) and say hello, introduce yourself, and ask questions. Post your progress. If you are having problems, say so, and ask for help. Keep coming back, and you will stay motivated.

There are also real-world versions of these groups, for many different goals, from running to quitting smoking to quitting alcohol and more. Look for such a group in your area and give them a call. A combination of online and off-line groups could also work.

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #19

Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #19: Hold Yourself Back

When I start with a new exercise program, or any new goal really, I am rarin’ to go. I am full of excitement, and my enthusiasm knows no boundaries. Nor does my sense of self-limitation. I think I can do anything. It’s not long before I learn that I do have limitations, and my enthusiasm begins to wane.

Well, a great motivator that I’ve learned is that when you have so much energy at the beginning of a program, and want to go all out — HOLD BACK. Don’t let yourself do everything you want to do. Only let yourself do 50-75 percent of what you want to do. And plan out a course of action where you slowly increase over time. For example, if I want to go running, I might think I can run 3 miles at first. But instead of letting myself do that, I start by only running a mile. When I’m doing that mile, I’ll be telling myself that I can do more! But I don’t let myself. After that workout, I’ll be looking forward to the next workout, when I’ll let myself do 1.5 miles. I keep that energy reined in, harness it, so that I can ride it even further.

This has an added benefit of stopping myself from getting injured or burned out. But I promise you, if you hold yourself back, your desire to continue only increases.

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Top 20 Motivation Hacks – #20


Quick intro: I first intended this Top 20 list to be in a single post, but I decided that breaking them into separate posts would allow me to concentrate on each a little more. So, I present my list of the Top 20 Motivation Hacks.

A number of people have commented that I must be dedicated to achieve some of the goals I’m going for: exercise, frugality, organization, healthy eating, etc. Well, I don’t believe in someone being naturally “dedicated” … it’s all a matter of motivation. You can achieve anything if you motivate yourself enough.

Motivation Hack #20: Chart Your Progress.

Today I also posted about how I created a chart to track my progress with each of my goals. This chart is not just for information purposes, for me to look back and see how I’m doing. It’s to motivate me to keep up with my goals. If I’m diligent about checking my chart every day, and marking dots or “x”s, then I will want to make sure I fill it with dots. I will think to myself, “I better do this today if I want to mark a dot.” Well, that’s a small motivation, but it helps, trust me. Some people prefer to use gold stars. Others have a training log, which works just as well. Or try Joe’s Goals. However you do it, track your progress, and allow yourself a bit of pride each time you give yourself a good mark.

Now, you will have some bad marks on your chart. That’s OK. Don’t let a few bad marks stop you from continuing. Strive instead to get the good marks next time.

Over time, if you stick with this motivational tool, you will start to get a lot of good marks. And that is one of the best feelings in the world.

Monday, December 16, 2013

How to Stop Living Paycheck to Paycheck

For a few years, I went through tough financial times. I was getting further and further into debt, not paying some of my bills (which then went to collectors) and always behind, even on payday. It took me awhile to step back and realize that this situation was all of my own making, due to my own choices and financial habits, and that it was possible to change.

Today, things have gotten better, although I’m not out of the red yet. I have begun saving, I’ve paid off several small debts and am well on my way to paying off my credit card (which I’ve canceled), and hope to pay off my car by the end of the year. I plan to be debt free in a little over a year, with good prospects after that. I’m also planning for retirement, a little travel, and a simple house. My finances are much better off today than they were just a year and a half ago.

Kiplinger magazine just posted a good article entitled, “Stop Living From Paycheck to Paycheck” and I’d like to share my thoughts on the subject as well. Some of my advice will be similar to Kiplinger, but mine is more practical, I think. I’ve been there, and I am living this advice.

First things first
Kiplingers recommends starting by tracking all of your spending on a daily basis, which is a typical recommendation from financial advisors and blogs, and is good advice. But mine is attempting to be practical — I’ve been there, in the trenches, and I know that keeping track of daily spending can be difficult. I advise you to do it, but if you don’t, for whatever reason, don’t let that stop you from fixing your finances.

My recommendation is that, whether or not you track your spending (and you should), at least do the following:

Stop the bleeding. Stop using your credit and debit cards immediately. Cut them up, or put them in the freezer in a ziploc bag filled with water, effectively freezing your cards. Also stop taking other loans, either from banks or finance companies or friends or family. Stop getting into more debt.
Start saving now! The next most important step you can take, in the beginning, is to start a small savings account if you haven’t already. Begin depositing into it regularly, at least $100 per paycheck but more if you can. If you can’t find $100 then see the next step for how. Make it an automatic deposit, the first bill you pay each payday, because it is the most important! A savings account will help you smooth out your finances — when an emergency comes up, like your car breaking down or someone having to go to the hospital, you won’t be thrown back into debtedness or brokedness. You will have some cash to pay for that emergency, and you can use your regular paycheck for regular expenses.
Look at discretionary spending. If you can’t find $100-200 to save per paycheck, then you need to cut some things from your spending. This is where tracking your spending comes in handy, but even if you don’t, you know some of the extras you spend on — cigarettes, coffee, snacks, candy, desserts, eating out, magazines, shopping for clothes or gadgets or toys or shoes, books, going out … these are just a few of the examples. I’m not saying you need to cut everything out, but if you can cut a few of them, or maybe just one at a time, that can add up. Then, take the money you didn’t spend on those discretionary items, and put that amount into savings each payday. Increase this over time. (See How I Save Money.)
Start a debt snowball to begin getting out of debt. If you haven’t read about debt snowballs, they’re simple. List out your debts and arrange them in order from smallest balance at the top to largest at the bottom. Then focus on the debt at the top, putting as much as you can into it, even if it’s just $40-50 extra (more would be better). When that amount is paid off, celebrate! Then take the total amount you were paying (say $70 minimum payment plus the $50 extra for a total of $120) and add that to the minimum payment of the next largest debt. Continue this process, with your extra amount snowballing as you go along, until you pay off all your debts. This could take several years, but it’s a very rewarding process, and very necessary.
Now that you’re out of the ER
Those are the first, emergency steps to take. While you’re doing those steps, start on these:

Make a budget. I know, it’s a dreaded word for most of us. But it’s not that hard, and if you set it up right, it’s fairly simple. I recommend using a simple spreadsheet. List all your regular expenses (rent, car, utilities, internet, etc.) and their amounts, and then your variable expenses (groceries, gas, eating out, etc.), and then your irregular expenses (things like car maintenance or medical that might not come up every month, but break them into estimated monthly expenses — if you spend $600 a year on car maintenance, budget a $50 monthly expense). Now match that up against your income. The expenses should be less.
Automate your bills. As much as possible, try to get your bills to be paid through automatic deduction. For those that can’t, use your bank’s online check system to make regular automatic payments. This way, all of your regular expenses in your budget are taken care of. Make sure that your savings is done the same way – automatic deduction.
Save for your irregular expenses. Some call it a Freedom Account, but the key to ensuring that you have smooth finances and that you stick to your budget is to take into account all your irregular expenses, such as insurance, car maintenance or repairs, gifts (think Christmas!), medical and other such things. List them out, estimate your annual spending, and begin saving for them each month. Again, if you spend $600 on car repairs, budget $50 a month for that expense, and put that amount in savings. You could set up different accounts for each expense in an online bank such as ING or Emigrant, or put it all in one account and use Money or Quicken or a spreadsheet to keep track of each. Then, and here’s the key, when these expenses come up, use that money for those expenses! That way, you can use your regular budget for the stuff it’s meant for, not for these “unexpected” expenses.
Use the envelope system for your variable expenses such as food and gas. This is optional, but it’s a good tip. I’ve been using it myself, and it works like a charm. Let’s say you set aside three amounts in your budget each payday — one for gas, one for groceries, one for eating out. Withdraw those amounts on payday, and put them in three separate envelopes. That way, you can easily track how much you have left for each of these expenses, and when you run out of money, you know it immediately. You don’t overspend in these categories. If you regularly run out too fast, you may need to rethink your budget.
Start thinking about your goals, and planning for them. When do you want to retire? How often do you want to travel? When do you want to buy that dream house? Do you want to save for your kids’ college education? Think about what you want in life, and start planning to save for them, especially once you’ve done all the above.
Once you’ve gotten beyond these steps, you should be past the paycheck-to-paycheck syndrome. Now there’s a whole world of personal finance options available to you, including investing your money for your goals. But getting past these first stages is important.

Sunday, December 15, 2013

What is truly necessary? A guide to living frugal

An ongoing quest for me, and one that I am renewing this year, is to eliminate all that is unnecessary from my life. Now, you might read this and think that I am cutting everything fun from my life, but that’s not true. Let me explain.

The first question in this quest, of course, is what does “necessary” mean? We must first examine what things are necessary … and the first question in this examination is … necessary for what? What is the true aim? My answer, which will be different than others, is “necessary for a happy life.”

This definition, then, would include many things besides the basics of clothing, shelter and food. I might not need a good relationship with my wife in order to survive, but it is necessary for me to be happy in life (I’ve found). Same thing with my kids. To be happy, I must develop a good relationship with them, make them happy, and spend time with them.

But that doesn’t mean that anything I do with them counts as necessary. I can be happy with my children just by going to a free park — I don’t need to buy them things all the time, or go costly entertainment (like movies, the mall, or waterparks).

Similarly, we need to eat, but we don’t need to eat junk food. True, you might say that sweets, or french fries, make you happy. Well, that’s the key to this whole exercise: do you really need something to be happy? And even more, do you need it on a daily basis, or can it be an occasional treat?

Coffee and chocolate are two recent examples for me. I love both. A lot. But I am addicted to them (because of the caffeine), and that makes me want them more than I really need them to be happy. So I am trying to cut them out, at least for now. I think later, after I kick the habit, I can indulge in those things as a treat, once in awhile, without lapsing into addiction.

Other things I can cut out (except as treats):

Going to movies (I rarely do this anymore)
Sweets, like pastries or baked goods or candies (rarer now, but still a MAJOR temptation)
toys (gizmos and gadgets that are a lot of fun, but not necessary – like an mp3 player)
new books (I try to buy used now, or trade em)
eating out (have been trying to cut back, but still lapse more than I should)
And some things that I need to think hard about:

cable internet (I have this at work — it’s nice at home, but I’m not sure if it’s necessary)
cell phone (I don’t NEED it too much — it’s convenient, but it’s rare that I really need it)
On the whole, I’ve cut out a lot already, and I’m very happy with the simplicity I’ve created so far. I have a lot more to do, but it’s the process that I enjoy, not the end product.

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Zen Mind: How to Declutter

One of the things that gives me most peace is have a clean, simple home. When I wake up in the morning and walk out into a living room that has been decluttered, that has a minimalist look, and there isn’t junk lying around, there is a calm and joy that enters my heart.

When, on the other hand, I walk out into a living room cluttered with toys and books and extra things all over the place, it is chaos and my mind is frenetic.

I’ve been a simplifier and a declutterer for years now (probably 8-9 years) and I’ve gotten pretty good at it, but I’ve found that you have to keep coming back to revisit your clutter every once in awhile.

Here are my top decluttering tips:

Do it in small chunks. Set aside just 15 minutes to declutter just one shelf, and when that shelf or that 15 minutes is up, celebrate your victory. Then tackle another shelf for 15 minutes the next day. Conquering an entire closet or room can be overwhelming, and you might put it off forever. If that’s the case, just do it in baby steps.
Set aside a couple hours to do it. This may seem contradictory to the above tip … and it is. It’s simply a different strategy, and I say do whatever works for you. Sometimes, for me, it’s good to set aside part of a morning, or an entire Saturday morning, to declutter a closet or room. I do it all at once, and when I’m done, it feels awesome.
Take everything out of a shelf or drawer at once. Whichever of the two above strategies you choose, you should focus on one drawer or shelf at a time, and empty it completely. Then clean that shelf or drawer. Then, take the pile and sort it (see next tip), and put back just what you want to keep. Then tackle the next shelf or drawer.
Sort through your pile, one item at a time, and make quick decisions. Have a trash bag and a give-away box handy. When you pull everything out of a shelf or drawer, sort through the pile one at a time. Pick up an item, and make a decision: trash, give away, or keep. Don’t put it back in the pile. Do this with the entire pile, and soon, you’ll be done. If you keep sorting through the pile, and re-sorting, it’ll take forever. Put back only what you want to keep, and arrange it nicely.
Be merciless. You may be a pack rat, but the truth is, you won’t ever use most of the junk you’ve accumulated. If you haven’t used it in the last year, get rid of it. It’s as simple as that. If you’ve only used it once or twice in the last year, but know you won’t use it in the next year, get rid of it. Toss it if it’s unsalvageable, and give it away if someone else might be able to use it.
Papers? Be merciless, unless it’s important. Magazines, catalogues, junk mail, bills more than a year old, notes to yourself, notes from others, old work stuff … toss it! The only exception is with tax-related stuff, which should be kept for seven years, and other important documents like warranties, birth and death and marriage certificates, insurance, wills, and other important documents like that. But you’ll know those when you see ‘em. Otherwise, toss!!!!
If you are on the fence with a lot of things, create a “maybe” box. If you can’t bear to toss something because you might need it later, put it in the box, then close the box, label it, and put it in storage (garage, attic, closet), out of sight. Most likely, you’ll never open that box again. If that’s the case, pull it out after six months or a year, and toss it or give it away.
Create a system to stop clutter from accumulating. There’s a reason you have tall stacks of papers all over the place, and big piles of toys and books and clothes. It’s because you don’t have a regular system to keep things in their place, and get rid of stuff you don’t need. This is a topic for another day, but it’s something to think about as you declutter. You’ll never get to perfect, but if you think more intelligently about how your house got cluttered, perhaps you can find ways to stop it from happening again.
Celebrate when you’re done! This is actually a general rule in life: always celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small. Even if you just decluttered one drawer, that’s great. Treat yourself to something delicious. Open that drawer (or closet, or whatever), and admire its simplicity. Breathe deeply and know that you have done a good thing. Bask in your peacefulness.

Friday, December 13, 2013

Mind Like Water

As I just posted about my GTD implementation, I started thinking about what appeals to me most about GTD. Of course, there is its total organization and complete capture of everything in your life. There is the clean desk and inbox acheived by this system. I love all that.

But what really appeals to me is the idea of attaining a “Mind Like Water” state. I have to admit, I haven’t completely achieved this yet, as many GTDers have not. But GTD does bring me much closer to this ideal, and as I get better at the GTD habits, and trust my system more, I get closer each day.

It reminds me of a quote from Bruce Lee:

Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water my friend.

I think the appeal is the calmness and peace that you are trying to achieve. Have everything in its place, and empty your mind of busy-ness and junk. Then your are ready for anything that comes your way. Sometimes when I don’t feel this way, I look at others around me, and realize that I have come a long way towards Mind Like Water.

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Why I Read (+ a Dozen Book Recommendations)

In the quiet morning hours, or as I fade off to sleep at night, I cuddle up with a good novel.
This book is my world, my quiet time away from the din and discordance of the everyday world, but it’s also a way to explore the world in imaginative new ways.
There’s nothing that beats it.
I get lost in worlds wholly created by an author, imagined but containing truths about life, incisively commenting about life, reproducing it in beautiful new ways, putting me in the mind of another human being, grabbing my heart and dragging it through the thrill of falling in love or the dull numbness of divorce or the fear of being found out, giving me the power of flight or omniscience or magic, confessing about guilty deeds and crimes and affairs, taking me into richly reimagined periods of history, helping me time travel and space travel and regular travel into new lands, showing me how other people live in helplessness, in slavery, in squalor, in power and luxury, in prostitution and presidency, making the mundane seem magical and the magical seem possible.
This is why I read.
Reading has been shown to make us more empathetic people, but it also helps us learn to sit still for longer without distractions, and gives us a break from the pull of smartphones and the online world.
Reading is one of my favorite habits, and though once in awhile I slip away from it, I always come back.

Leo’s Book Recommendations

If you’d like to read more fiction, here’s a list of some of my favorite books to get you started (in no means comprehensive):
I also love books by Kurt Vonnegut, Nick Hornby, Kazuo Ishiguro, Haruki Murakami, Raymond Chandler, William Gibson, Stephen King and John D. Macdonald.
Tougher but great books:
As for non-fiction books … this list is a bit old but I still like the books here.

Form the Reading Habit

If you’re interested in forming the habit of reading more, join my Sea Change Program, where we’re tackling the habit with our Read More habit module in November.
The module will consist of:
  1. A simple plan to follow — 5-10 minutes a day
  2. A few articles during the month to help you implement the habit
  3. Reminder emails every day (if you want them) to help you stick with the changes
  4. An accountability group in the Sea Change forum to keep you on track
  5. A live video webinar in the middle of the month
Five tools that will help you stay on track with this new habit, for $10 a month (we have a different module each month).

Why I Read (+ a Dozen Book Recommendations)

In the quiet morning hours, or as I fade off to sleep at night, I cuddle up with a good novel.
This book is my world, my quiet time away from the din and discordance of the everyday world, but it’s also a way to explore the world in imaginative new ways.
There’s nothing that beats it.
I get lost in worlds wholly created by an author, imagined but containing truths about life, incisively commenting about life, reproducing it in beautiful new ways, putting me in the mind of another human being, grabbing my heart and dragging it through the thrill of falling in love or the dull numbness of divorce or the fear of being found out, giving me the power of flight or omniscience or magic, confessing about guilty deeds and crimes and affairs, taking me into richly reimagined periods of history, helping me time travel and space travel and regular travel into new lands, showing me how other people live in helplessness, in slavery, in squalor, in power and luxury, in prostitution and presidency, making the mundane seem magical and the magical seem possible.
This is why I read.
Reading has been shown to make us more empathetic people, but it also helps us learn to sit still for longer without distractions, and gives us a break from the pull of smartphones and the online world.
Reading is one of my favorite habits, and though once in awhile I slip away from it, I always come back.

Leo’s Book Recommendations

If you’d like to read more fiction, here’s a list of some of my favorite books to get you started (in no means comprehensive):
I also love books by Kurt Vonnegut, Nick Hornby, Kazuo Ishiguro, Haruki Murakami, Raymond Chandler, William Gibson, Stephen King and John D. Macdonald.
Tougher but great books:
As for non-fiction books … this list is a bit old but I still like the books here.

Form the Reading Habit

If you’re interested in forming the habit of reading more, join my Sea Change Program, where we’re tackling the habit with our Read More habit module in November.
The module will consist of:
  1. A simple plan to follow — 5-10 minutes a day
  2. A few articles during the month to help you implement the habit
  3. Reminder emails every day (if you want them) to help you stick with the changes
  4. An accountability group in the Sea Change forum to keep you on track
  5. A live video webinar in the middle of the month
Five tools that will help you stay on track with this new habit, for $10 a month (we have a different module each month).

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

A Month Without Sugar

Life seems sweeter without sweets. Or at least, just as sweet.
If you’d suggested that I’d prefer a life that was pretty much devoid of sweet desserts a year ago, I would have laughed in scorn. I’ve always had a sweet tooth, mostly centered on chocolate but I also love pies and cookies and muffins and ice cream.
But as a part of my Year of Living Without, I gave up sugar in October. And in truth, it was fairly easy (with a few harder spots) because I’d mostly been going without sugar for the previous four months or so.
I found that life is just as fun, as enjoyable, as lovely without all the sugar. It’s not as necessary as I’d thought, not as horrible or lifeless without sugar as I’d anticipated.
I set out on this Year of Living Without to learn about my resistance, but the funny thing is that my resistance seems to be much greater when I’m imagining going without something I think I need, than it is when I actually go without it.
I thought giving up coffee would be incredibly hard, but it wasn’t hard at all (except for a few times when the allure of the smell was strong). I thought going without TV would be hard, but mostly I didn’t miss it. No sitting for more than 30 minutes actually was hard, but not because I missed sitting — only because I really got physically tired (often from running or working out).
So the resistance comes when we imagine the loss, not when we actually experience the loss. At least, that’s what I’ve been finding so far.
In this post, I’ll talk about a few of my thoughts and experiences going without sugar, and then share what I’m giving up in November (hint: it’s one of my hardest challenges yet).

Going Without Sugar

Some of what I learned and experienced in my month without sugar:
  • In the beginning of the month, I was traveling in Europe. Mostly didn’t miss the sugar, but I was definitely tempted when we found vegan gelato in Italy, then various vegan desserts in Vienna and London. Overall, it wasn’t hard — most of the desserts we passed weren’t vegan, so while they looked tasty, I’m not tempted to eat them (milk and eggs make me think of dead baby animals).
  • Most days of the month, I had no sweet temptations — if any sweets were around, they were non-vegan candies or desserts, so I didn’t care.
  • The challenge was easiest when I stay home or only go out to exercise or have tea with a friend. Staying away from restaurants or other people’s houses means no temptations.
  • Going to a vegan restaurant makes it a bit more challenging, as sometimes the kids have vegan desserts (a vegan chocolate shake was a bit tempting one day) but knowing that I’m not having sugar cuts off the temptation in my mind. So it’s not hard. If I didn’t have the challenge, I’d definitely share in their desserts.
  • In the middle of the month, I traveled to China — there are many interesting treats there, but mostly ones I can’t eat, so it wasn’t that hard. I think there was some mochi there that I would have loved, but I just didn’t give it much thought.
  • One day I bought the kids some chocolate chip cookies that would have been very tempting in the old days (just 6 months ago). But now I don’t have as much a taste of it — I think of the harm sugar does to my body, and how it doesn’t make me feel so good afterward, and sugar isn’t as appealing.
  • Near the end of the month was my son’s birthday. The coconut pancakes I made for breakfast weren’t tempting, nor was the cake and ice cream later. But Eva made some banana chocolate chip muffins that for some reason I craved. I just focused on my delicious Ezekiel cereal with nuts and berries and enjoyed it, so I was fine
  • One day I ate at both my favorite vegan restaurants in SF (that’s more than I usually eat out), and at lunch my friend ate one of my favorite vegan desserts. It was tempting but not too hard to resist, because I told him in advance that I couldn’t have a single bite. I think telling people about my no-sugar challenge helps me stick to it.
  • Trick or treating with the kids – I was tempted by Reeses peanut butter cups for some reason, but didn’t have any. Other candies did nothing for me.
  • When I keep myself busy, sweets aren’t even a thought.
  • When I’m tired, my willpower seems to drop, and temptations are harder. When I’m tired and hungry, I’m at my weakest.

November: No Computers/Internet Before Noon

So this month I’ve already had a small failure in my challenge. In November, I’m going without computers/Internet before noon (including smartphones, etc.) … except to write.
So I can use my laptop to write a post or work on my novel, but I can’t Google anything or check email or even read on my computer. No reading saved articles from the Internet either.
What will I do instead? I’ll read a novel (working my way through Joyce’s Ulysses right now) and write blog posts or work on my novel.
However, I missed the first day because I forgot. The challenge for the second day was when I really wanted to look things up, which I’m really used to doing immediately by now — instead, I wrote them down to look them up later.
This should be interesting.